Dear B,
In the twinkling of an eye, I’ve breastfed you for twenty months as of 13 Oct 2012. That was my target, since I also breastfed your jie jie for twenty months.
However, that’s probably where the similarity ends. You, my fiesty opinionated little tooka-tooka, show no inclination to stop nursing. In contrast, when I ‘prepared’ your older sis 2 weeks before she turned 20 months, that there was going to be ‘no more milk’, she accepted it on the day, and just placidly held my arm to sleep instead of nursing. But you. You have been nursing for more times in the night than your sis, who only nursed once before sleeping, and once just before waking from around 14-20 months. Perhaps it’s because we were more lazy, lax about co-sleeping with you, you nurse about 3-4 times a night most nights, sleep through without nursing on very good nights, and nurse ALL THE TIME (like 8-10 times) when you are feeling unwell. I have really all but forgotten what it’s like to have uninterrupted sleep. Though I do make up for the broken sleep by sleeping a lot (does quantity make up for poor quality? Prolly not.)
But I shall stop comparing. As the little sis, everything you do or don’t do is benchmarked against someone else. And I know that must be annoying.
Recently, you threw a great strop at 6am when I put my foot (?) down and said that 6 latches were enough for that night. You were ANGRY. You kicked your legs, twisted your body out of my arms when I tried to cuddle you back to sleep, screamed and wailed the ANGRY cry, and were inconsolable for quite a while. Your daddy decided that we’d have to teach you No means No, and that we weren’t going to give in to your grand tantrum. So he brought you out of the room. You continued your great throaty protests of “MA MA! MA MA! MERRRRK! MERRRRK!” Aunty Susan was awake by then, so she took over and tried to distract you. After a while, you succumbed to the lure of playing with ice (yes, that actually stopped you), and gradually reverted to your usual self.
One thing about you, you don’t bear grudges. When I said “Hi” to you about an hour later, you beamed and hugged me. You were so angry I thought you’d stalk away and ignore me for the day. But bless your little soul, you got over it good-naturedly enough.
I guess I don’t mind nursing you for longer, if nothing, to assuage my guilt at staying home till you were only 5 months plus, instead of being a SAHM for your sis till she was 14 months old. At this point, I have no idea how or when we are going to stop this breastfeeding marathon that we’re on. I suppose 2 years might be a good ‘next target’ to aim for (my poor back and disrupted sleep), but then again, seeing how you’re probably my last baby, I should cherish this, and be happy to nurse you for as long as you’d like (gulp).
Just try to cut me some slack and keep the nursing times to a max of 4 2 per night ok, baby?
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